Years ago, if I misbehaved, missed a curfew, or brought home a less than ideal report card, privileges would be taken away. If I was really naughty (so hard to imagine!) I would be grounded. No TV, no friends on the weekend, nothing. Nada.
However, the worst punishment by far was when my phone privileges were taken away. Literally. My baby blue push-button phone would be removed from my bedroom despite tears and dramatic protest, and with it, all connection to the world.
How many of you remember sitting on the phone for hours with your friends while watching TV or reading a book or just hearing the other person breathe, with the occasional “Hold on” to take a bathroom break or make a sandwich? What? That was just me?
Ring my bell, ring my bell…
Today, I hardly use my home phone at all. In fact, if it rings I am startled, and dare I say it, sometimes a little bit annoyed, because it only seems to ring when my hands are knuckle deep in cookie dough or I’m about to walk out the door. Usually, the only ones to call my home are telemarketers, and my mom – who refuses to call me on my cell because she worries I might be driving.
Today, almost everyone calls me on my cell, which was once a number only given to my inner circle. I feel that way about my landline now. I guard it like the Bat Phone.
Usually if I hear another person’s voice unless on the line it’s my husband or my kids or my BFF complaining she forgot what my voice sounds like. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a very social person. I have friends – ask anyone! It’s just that I’ve gotten used to relying on texts and emails to make social plans and do quick catch-ups with friends. (Omg, I’ve turned into a teenager!) And, thankfully, according to Time and The New York Times, I’m not alone with my affliction.
Does anyone talk on the phone anymore?
When was the last time I picked up a phone just to chat? More often then I let on, but, perhaps, not enough as I should to really stay connected with friends. You would think driving in the car would seem like the perfect time, but that’s when I enjoy listening to music, letting my mind wander, and perhaps belting out a song or two (windows up, of course).
Besides, some of my best ideas come to me while behind the wheel. I just can’t risk missing that. You see, I would much rather spend time chatting with friends over a meal or a walk. When I am home, I often use my cell phone rather than my landline so I can walk around and do things, like make a cup of tea, visit the pantry, or rearrange a closet. I get restless, you know.
So a few months ago, while making my New Year’s Resolutions List, I decided to add, in addition to the usual (lose five pounds, learn to cook, get new curtains) to “Pick up the phone.” Now that we’re almost four months into the new year, I’m still struggling to make an effort. I did find some lovely fabric for the curtains though.
Do you find yourself talking on the phone less too? Do you still use your landline?
Samantha says
I don’t even have a land-line at my home. I use only my cell for mostly texting and some calls. I do use video calling quite a bit though. I’ve been trying to mail things more often and become more intentional with hand written notes.
Cathy Chester says
I have found that too much information gets misinterpreted on social media. You can’t see a persons face, and you can’t hear the inflections in their voice. You can read information wrong, or misunderstand someones intentions and jump to the wrong conclusions.
Since I get paid to moderate FB groups I have to be on social media, aside from wanting to keep up with other blogs and keeping in touch with new online friends (like you!) But I’m trying to cut back, because I want to focus on using my time to get work in other creative areas.
My BFF (twins) and I made a pact to call each other once a week (sometimes it turns out more than that, because we all live far away from each other.) I love the phone to speak with them; it makes all the difference. Sometimes we even Skype.
I loved this post, Linda, because we are on the same wave length. Plus, I used to get my pink Princess phone taken away if I ever did something wrong. Which, of course, was never…..:-)
Kim Phillips says
My work also forces me to be on social media all the time, and there are voices I do miss. The upside is that I get to meet all kinds of cool people (like you), keep up with IRL friends who have moved hither and yon, and learn all kinds of business information by the simple fact that I’m on social media and seek out interesting people. I won’t demonize it, but I do miss hearing voices. I sent a get-well card to a friend in Israel and he CALLED ME ON THE PHONE. I just about fainted.
Kim Phillips says
I refuse to demonize social media (especially since I use it). I have to spend many hours there for my work, and I pick up all kinds of useful professional knowledge there. I also meet such interesting people and can keep up with my friends around the world. Recently, I sent a get-well card to a friend in Israel and he CALLED ME on the phone…I almost fainted. But mostly we follow each other’s antics on Facebook.
Christina Simon says
I prefer texting over the phone. Friends know I never answer my cell and the home phone is covered in dust!
Sheryl says
I know; I agree with everything you are saying. Although…sometimes it is just easier to email or text. BUT…nothing takes the place of a phone call and hearing someone else’s voice!
Kim Phillips says
Ditched the land line entirely about a year ago. It was only used by telemarketers to annoy me during dinner. But I do miss the casualness and intimacy of talking on the phone with a friend. Part of what’s killing that is that everybody uses their cell phone now, and they may not think to turn it off, so you hesitate to call in the event it’s a major interruption for them and for everyone around them. I have one friend who routinely leaves her phone on when she’s in the doctor’s office or at lunch or in shul and when I call, I get a most annoyed response. (Not my freakin’ fault you didn’t think to turn your ringer off.) Nowadays, voice mail is considered by some to be rude (make me sit through two or three minutes of rambling just to get “call me back”?) Texting seems the most polite thing to do. But it’s cold and has the same pitfalls (like lack of tone) that email does.
Hayley Kaplan says
Absolutely. Talking on the phone is a dying art that is being replaced by email and texting. I’m writing an article about the importance of parents reminding kids to talk on the phone and in person instead of only on social media or texts. Who would have ever thought we’d ever encourage phone use? It turns out that talking on the phone is an important social skill too that can also be compromised by lack of practice.
Lois Alter Mark says
I always tell my kids to pick up the phone and call their friends rather than just text them, and they have both told me that’s rude!! I find myself guilty of the same thing now, though. I hardly ever talk on the phone and I totally agree with you about the car. I like that alone time to think and listen to music. I’d much rather talk to my friends in person over lunch!
Elaine says
Funny how our relationship with the telephone has changed with the invention of cell phones and texting…I often feel that calling someone at home seems intrusive, but it used to be the other way around! Thanks for another great post CG.
Sandra says
I guess I’m he anomaly I hate talking on my cell. But I love the ease of texting. Much prefer to talk on the land line.
There’s something more intimate about taking on a landline. The cell phone is for a quick text or quick call. I guess I’m old fashioned.
Helene Cohen Bludman says
I did the same thing you did, Linda – hung on the phone for hours with my friends and annoyed the hell out of my parents! Eventually my mother put a time limit on these calls. But these days I rarely talk on the phone anymore and find myself texting instead. Feel free to call me anytime and we’ll talk. 🙂
Chrystal Viera says
That is so true , I was just thinking of how I can get a friend to stop texting me and learn to pick up the phone . It’s sad w hen everyone is to busy to sit down and have a chat . Thank you for this post . Made me happy 🙂
est. 1975 says
We don’t even have a land line anymore because if we did we’d never use it. Though, I do miss my beige Ameritech princess phone and “teen line” from way back when (remember when it just said “Teen Line” in the phone book? Remember the phone book?)
Kyle says
I’m a throwback. I hate talking for more than a minute or two on my cell. When I call friends for a chat I pick up the land line – it feels right. If I’m home and someone calls me on my cell, I have to follow the sound to find it. At least with the land line, I know where it is.
C. Lee Reed says
What’s a landline? ha hah We don’t even own a house phone anymore; probably not for at least 10 years.
Emily says
Yup – agree with all of this. I recall sitting on the phone with my friends after school and we’d watch the “Brady Bunch” simultaneously. Ahhh, the 70s. I have found that the older I became, the less I wanted to talk on the phone. I’m not sure if that had to do with new technology/email/text or if it would have happened anyway. I will say, however, that when I talk to an old friend on the phone, I thoroughly enjoy it because it’s such a novelty rather than a regular occurrence.
Heidi Sloss says
I love talking on the phone and while I text and email to communicate, I can not stand all the back it takes to make one single date. I use my drive time to catch up with my mother, father or mother-in-law (bluetooth on of course). We still have a land line, but use it less and less. But because we live in earthquake country, we have been told that it has a higher probability of working in an emergency than our cells, so we keep the dinosaur around. Frankly the land line is just one more way for relatives to leave voice mails that take up time to listen to.
Estelle Sobel Erasmus says
Linda, I’m with you. I almost never use my land line. Usually I text or put my cell phone on speaker. I only use my land line to hear better than with my cell phone. Also, lucky you, I never had my own Princess phone in my room LOL.
Susan Bonifant says
I’ve become less tolerant of the phone since growing used to the multi-tasking you can do with one-sided communication. It’s made special occasions out of the rest of the times when you’re on the phone by choice, with your feet up and your coffee near.
Susan Bonifant says
I’ve become less tolerant of the phone since growing used to the multi-tasking you can do with one-sided communication. It’s made special occasions out of the rest of the times when you’re on the phone by choice, with your feet up and your coffee near.
Sandra Sallin says
I still prefer talking on a landline. Maybe it’s because I have lousy reception in my house. You have to go out to the driveway to speak. Thus I’m proabably the only person in Los Angeles that still uses a landline. It’s not even a portable one. Ancient I am.
Carol Cassara says
I still use a landline, still talk on the phone and do text a bit…but don’t get why people prefer texting. Today, punishment is taking away texting ability…
Sarah Maizes says
Such a great post and such a good question. I think all the time how much more satisfying it is to connect with friends on the phone. Thank GOD for Bluetooth!!! 🙂
Matt Steiner says
I am land-line free, but I still talk on the phone with my mother for hours. Everyone else is a mix of texts and in-person hangout time.
Great post – made me a bit reflective on my communication habits. 🙂
Susie (The Esthetic Goddess) says
My mom is the only one I call regularly but this is only because she doesn’t have a cell phone! She refuses to get one. She has no idea what the internet even is, bless her.
Parri (Her Royal Thighness) says
OMG, I feel the same way! I used to talk on the phone for hours … study with friends, watch the same TV show at the same time, so we could talk about it as we watched. It was my lifeline. Now I hate it. I know it’s a necessary evil, but when the home phone rings, I feel like it’s an intrusion. I would so much rather talk to people during the day and keep my family life sacred. Maybe that started when I had my daughter. When you’re a f/t working mom, that time with your little one is just so special, you don’t want anything to get in the way. I also mostly use my cell phone, and I AM grateful for the friends I connect to … who have supported me during rough times by just “checking in.” But there’s something about the land line now … when it rings, it’s usually someone I don’t want to talk to (like you said … telemarketers!). It’s very jarring when it rings in the middle of the night (usually a wrong number). I always think someone died.
By the way, GREAT to meet you at Erma. Wish we could have gotten to know each other better, but I hope to get to know you through your blog. LOVE your artwork!